Payos

(Picture courtesy of breslev-midot.com.)

Reb Chaim Vital says, that Arizal did cut his peyoys, so they wouldn't go into "zokeyn mamash", i.e. actual beard. Ariza"l says nothing about cheek bone. 

There are two ways to read this.1. Simply the beginning of the beard (i.e. cheek bone). This understanding is used by Chabad and Chernobyl.

2. The beard under one's chin (here the "mamash" is stressed, i.e. the actual beard is understood as the part of the beard underneath one's chin. This is practiced by many chasidim, including Breslov.

I started growing my payos a little more than 3 years ago. There are close to 12 inches long and have been unkept and uncut since my decision. It was based on a few factors mostly based on the inspiration and chizzuk (strength) I received from the Chassidus I was learning. A more shallow and childish reason was to look as much non Lubavitch as possible. The topic of payos was brought up as I was learning chassidus and the Rebbe says very sharply in an igros that anyone who has long payos cant think that they hold by the Arizal in respect to payos at least. Im not sure if it was a good thing but I read almost the entire thread on Chabadtalk.com about payos and what Chabad Chassidus and the Rebbe say. Last Shabbos someone asked me if my children will have "langer payos", to which I responded I dont know. Then it happened.

I almost cut them. Mamash. Finally asked my wife and she said that I would get so much flack from people as they mostly have forgotten what I looked like without these massive side locks. I asked a close Lubavitch friend and he said not to cut them yet and that we need to talk. 

This all culminates with a dream I had last night where the Rebbe visited me to tell me to come for Mincha. I instead went to watch TV. Now I havent owned a TV in almost 3 years and rarely do I sit down to watch TV so this was quite perplexing. After I went outside and the Rebbe was in a horse drawn carriage and it then morphed into a massive set of bleachers with Chassidim on it. I couldnt get inside the carriage and then saw in the window my son was also inside. When I went up the bleachers to go down the other side my son and the Rebbe was gone. Then my wife yelled at me for not watching my son and I woke up. 

B"H My wife has been very supportive of this whole process and I thank HaKodesh Baruch Hu for giving me a Beshert that is so loving, understanding, caring, and supportive.